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Ego Fortification, Projections I

Using Projections to Improve Your Ego Status
In terms of psychology, "projections" are behaviours we have which we attribute to others. It has been said that when you point a finger at someone else, four fingers point back at you...

I remember reading as a youngster that what you don't like in others is a something you yourself are guilty of. This is one of the oddities of our psychology, that we have this propensity to find fault with others for doing the same things we do.

Some body who is highly critical of others usually finds being criticised unacceptable. Something we find objectionable in others may seem like a good thing in ourselves: we may convince ourselves we are just rying to help with our criticism, whereas other people are just plain nasty. We always tend to ascribe the best motives to our own actions, without considering how our actions appear to others.

The thing about this is that we are usually blissfully unaware of these traits in ourselves, although we may be hyper-aware of them in others. And herein lies the usefulness of this observation. If you are not aware you are doing something, you're not going to try to change it, are you? Now you have a tool to reveal those aspects of our life scripts of which we are so blissfully unaware.

Make a list of things other people do that really bother you - being hyper-critical may be one of them, or perhaps table-manners, or not sticking to an agreement, or being late for appointments. This list will probably never be complete, but you can keep adding to it whenever you find something you dislike about someone else. You can make a similar list about things you admire in others

Now take the lists and try and see if you do any of them. This can be hard for us to admit, so it is probably better to ask someone who is known for brutal honesty and who knows you well. They will have an unbiased view of how you act towards others.


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